She found me at my darkest hour
Torn by the world around me, I was lost. My tears fell daily and were no more noticed than as an annoyance. All others had either forgotten me or moved on, except for two exceptional girls. One will be given her due credit on another date, but to the other, this is for her. She came from so far away, and such a move could only have been directed by God. I was broken, torn, abused, and lost with only a meager light to guide me, until I met her. I already said that she found me, which really describes it best. I was so far gone and shunned by all with self respect, but she reached out anyway. She saw my pain, my tears, and showed me what I needed most. Love, the pure love of God.
She gave me smiles when I was down
She gave me hope when the world was darkest
She held me when I cried
She never asked why I hurt, which was better than any well-meaning but misplaced condolences
She showed me the joy in the outcasts and the beautifully different ones
She showed me the beauty in being unique
She showed me the love that brokenness can create
She showed me the power of the imagination
She challenged me to think deeper
She understood my needs
And she gave me the greatest gift any human can give to another, a view at God. I once heard a man say, "Do I love my wife more than I love Jesus? Honestly, I'm not sure, because so often I see Jesus through my wife." She showed me love so great, love for everyone (even those who tried to hurt her), for everything and anything created by our Lord. I still don't truly understand how such love could ever exist in a human, but it was there. I can say she paid more attention to me, but I don't think she loved me more than any other, her love for all was so great.
She may be imperfect, forgetful, not always the wisest decision-maker, in pain, and basically just a human, but none of it mattered in the glaringly beautiful light of her love.
To one of the best friends I have ever had, never stop loving. The world will be a far darker place if you do. I hope that you can bless someone else half as much as you did me, because the world does need you, even if it means one person at a time. Perhaps she does not agree with this description but, God bless you, my friend.
God bless you, Taylor Neas.
Monday, July 29, 2013
Saturday, July 27, 2013
Down the Rabbit Hole
As my close friends know, I am obsessed with books. They are an escape from life and a fantastic portal to amazing places and people. One book I have only recently read, is Lewis Carroll (I think I spelled that right...) Alice In Wonderland. And yet, I had read modern novels extending the classic story, listened to music inspired by it, and have seen many such similar movies and t.v. series long before I ever touched the book. So why do I find it so, I suppose the best term would be, magnetic, and why have I for so long? The story of a young girl chasing a well-dressed rabbit who just happens to speak English down a gigantic hole into a fantastic world of opposites, nonsense, and fantastics, when summarized, sounds rather plain, but it is exciting nonetheless. Why? I have never seen the movie rendition (deemed to psychedelic for a child by my mother), and have read hundreds of stories of ordinary (and sometimes extraordinary) children passing through fantastical gateways to strange and backward worlds. Why is Wonderland so different? This is one question that I cannot find an answer to. Perhaps it is its very nature, so different from our own world, that fascinates me. However, I must admit to have taken a dive down the rabbit hole of my imagination and visited it for myself. And, it is truly, amazingly fantastic.
To Run With Perseverence
I have set the two following sites to come up every time I bring up the internet: Bible Gateway, and Google. The second is my go-to site for everything from email to surfing. The first, however, is a sort of self-set push for myself. You see, Bible Gateway has a "Verse of the day", and I have taken to forcing myself to read the verse at least once before starting my internet for the day. Gets me real close to God, I know, but no matter how tired or in a rush I am, the verse comes first.
Today's verse was Romans 12:1, a very popular (and frankly, overused, in my opinion) verse that got to me today. It goes like, "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us."
This really got to me today. You see, my genetics aren't the greatest on my dad's side, and I seem to have many of his traits (for better or worse). One of which is not so great feet. Walking for me has be very painful for the past few days, and now has gotten me into physical therapy 3 or more times a week and racked up various bills totaling together in the hundreds for my parents.
When I read this verse, I was a bit annoyed at God, as I sometimes get. Things like, "It's not fair that I can't walk" and "Why now? Heck, why ever?" and "What the heck do you expect out of me, God? You want me to hobble down the race of life with one foot?" crossed my mind. And then, it struck me, how much I am spiritually limping down the race already. How we all are, in humanity. But it doesn't matter how we are physically, that is why this isn't a physical race. It is a spiritual one, and these genetics are part of the race marked out for me. Just like a physical race, it is going to be hard for me. What does it matter? This is what God wants for me, and I need to give it my all, even if that means not being physically up to par all the time with others.
Today's verse was Romans 12:1, a very popular (and frankly, overused, in my opinion) verse that got to me today. It goes like, "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us."
This really got to me today. You see, my genetics aren't the greatest on my dad's side, and I seem to have many of his traits (for better or worse). One of which is not so great feet. Walking for me has be very painful for the past few days, and now has gotten me into physical therapy 3 or more times a week and racked up various bills totaling together in the hundreds for my parents.
When I read this verse, I was a bit annoyed at God, as I sometimes get. Things like, "It's not fair that I can't walk" and "Why now? Heck, why ever?" and "What the heck do you expect out of me, God? You want me to hobble down the race of life with one foot?" crossed my mind. And then, it struck me, how much I am spiritually limping down the race already. How we all are, in humanity. But it doesn't matter how we are physically, that is why this isn't a physical race. It is a spiritual one, and these genetics are part of the race marked out for me. Just like a physical race, it is going to be hard for me. What does it matter? This is what God wants for me, and I need to give it my all, even if that means not being physically up to par all the time with others.
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
The Philadelphia Experiment
Ever since I was little, I have been surrounded by science fiction and conspiracy theories. My dad is an honest man who has recently been bumping around from job to job due to health issues, but means well. He loves sci-if and abnormal stuff, is an abstract artist of at least decent skill, and loves to find the truth behind the matter (whatever that matter may be). I take a point to decide for myself what I think worthy of belief, but there is one story that has always fascinated me. It is known as the Philadelphia Experiment.
There is some disagreement as to whether this actually occurred, and the stories that exist are diverse to say the least, but according to the accounts, the USS Eldridge (a Navy ship) went on one heck of a journey.
You see, there is this Einstein theory that says something along the lines of if you can manage to move faster than light, you can travel anywhere and to any time. Yes, this is meaning a time machine with transportation capabilities, and it would be completely invisible to boot.
Naturally, the Navy was interested, at the time being in the middle of WWII. So, as the story goes, the USS Eldridge traveled to Philadelphia PA, where it was given the equipment that would make such a time machine necessary. The ship, after a few small test rounds of trying their cloaking (and supposedly succeeding on some small scale), they then went for the big one.
According to all reports, this is where things get interesting. The ship disappeared, completely, and in a matter of seconds appeared in Norfolk, Virginia, where it remained for a little while until it disappeared from there and returned to Philadelphia, and supposedly losing 10 seconds in the process.
The ship was in perfect condition, but not, according to the story, was the crew. Many had been found fused with the bulkhead itself, and one even found himself with his hand in the bulkhead and himself a deck below where he was previously. Some were simply missing, others dead. A few were mutilated, and many were insane. Some stories claim the men were then brainwashed to prevent the story from getting out.
The Navy denies everything, claiming no tests were made upon the vessel. Some equipment was apparently put upon it to make it invisible to mines. The site gave the official route of the ship, as well as a small label at the bottom saying there really is no official, legitimate proof that has been found to support the supposed "Project Rainbow".
So what do you think? A true conspiracy, or merely a good urban/war myth kept alive by men still living in their mom's basement? Personally, I don't know what to make of it, but I would love to hear your opinion on this.
There is some disagreement as to whether this actually occurred, and the stories that exist are diverse to say the least, but according to the accounts, the USS Eldridge (a Navy ship) went on one heck of a journey.
You see, there is this Einstein theory that says something along the lines of if you can manage to move faster than light, you can travel anywhere and to any time. Yes, this is meaning a time machine with transportation capabilities, and it would be completely invisible to boot.
Naturally, the Navy was interested, at the time being in the middle of WWII. So, as the story goes, the USS Eldridge traveled to Philadelphia PA, where it was given the equipment that would make such a time machine necessary. The ship, after a few small test rounds of trying their cloaking (and supposedly succeeding on some small scale), they then went for the big one.
According to all reports, this is where things get interesting. The ship disappeared, completely, and in a matter of seconds appeared in Norfolk, Virginia, where it remained for a little while until it disappeared from there and returned to Philadelphia, and supposedly losing 10 seconds in the process.
The ship was in perfect condition, but not, according to the story, was the crew. Many had been found fused with the bulkhead itself, and one even found himself with his hand in the bulkhead and himself a deck below where he was previously. Some were simply missing, others dead. A few were mutilated, and many were insane. Some stories claim the men were then brainwashed to prevent the story from getting out.
The Navy denies everything, claiming no tests were made upon the vessel. Some equipment was apparently put upon it to make it invisible to mines. The site gave the official route of the ship, as well as a small label at the bottom saying there really is no official, legitimate proof that has been found to support the supposed "Project Rainbow".
So what do you think? A true conspiracy, or merely a good urban/war myth kept alive by men still living in their mom's basement? Personally, I don't know what to make of it, but I would love to hear your opinion on this.
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